I was fortunate growing up to have a really great mom. She was the kind of person one thinks of when you say “mother”. She was a really involved parent – she made the pom-poms for sports day, sewed pretty dresses for me, came to all the parent-teacher meetings, and was always there when we got home from school with a sandwich and a glass of milk.

Yet the greatest gift she has ever given me is her own financial and emotional independence in her later years. Unlike so many of my friends and peers, I do not have to financially support my mother in her old age and I also don’t have to worry about her. In fact her life is so full at the age of 75 she has to make time in her diary to see me!

While not wealthy, my mother has enough money not to have to worry about buying her groceries or meeting her bills. She has enough money to enjoy her golden years now that she finally has the time to take holidays and follow her numerous hobbies.

Her journey here, however, was not paved with gold. It took sacrifice and commitment. When I was 16 years old my father passed away leaving our family in financial dire straits with enormous debts. With my brother and me still at school, my mother, at the age of 48, had to find work after being a stay-at-home mom for nearly 20 years. She was forced to sell our family home to settle the debts and our furniture to pay for groceries and petrol.

It was a tough road and money was always tight but my mother made the sacrifices then that led to her financial freedom today. While I moved in with my older sister she rented a room in an acquaintance’s home and worked all hours, day and night, starting a catering company. She counted her pennies.

Although over time she had managed to build a smaller house with what was left of the money from the family home, she rented it out and moved into a rent-free, one-roomed cottage on a friend’s property to save money while studying to be a national tour guide. I remember my siblings and I thinking at the time that she had truly lost her mind, choosing to live this Spartan life contained within a 30m² room, yet she continuously focused on becoming financially independent.

I remember being frustrated at the lack of money and that everything came down to not having enough money for anything – except our education. Somehow she still managed to pay for my university fees – another gift far greater than any toy, branded clothing or Ipad (had they been around) could ever be.

Although she has now retired and has a lovely home fully paid for, she is not lavish with her money. She has that culture embedded in the older generation who just don’t value material things the way our generation does – what she has is enough for her.

I was speaking to my brother recently about the lessons we have learnt from our parents – different lessons from each, but both valuable in their different ways:

From our father we learnt the importance of making sure we do not live in debt, to put enough money away for our retirement and to have insurance so that our children can be provided for and educated should we die too early. We learnt that spending money to keep up appearances comes at too high a price.

From our mother we learnt that no financial disaster is too big to overcome if you are prepared to take the necessary action and that saying “no” today can provide you with financial freedom later. We have also learnt that the best gift we can give our children is not the latest fashion fad, Iphone or a new car but a decent education and financially secure parents. With these gifts our children will be free to make choices and hopefully grow into financially secure adults.

This article originally appeared in City Press.